Lara Bricker's Blog

Thankful for a Toddler's Imagination

Lara Bricker — Mon, 23 Nov 2009 14:56:05 -0500

Two weeks ago my grandmother who is 92 and lives with us went to the emergency room for what I thought was a heart attack. Turns out it was pneumonia and she seems to have rebounded with rest, plenty of fluids and her course of antibiotics which is a wonderful thing.

I’m always very aware of how Will responds to my grandmother’s health and the fact that she will not always be around with us. When she went to the hospital, Will definitely knew something was up. He was just going to sleep when I went and got my husband, who I rely on for all medical issues as he is a paramedic. At the time, my husband was putting Will to bed. So immediately, Will knew something was wrong as his bedtime routine was thrown for a loop.

I took over bedtime duty and Ken went to take over medical duty. We all made it through the night, though Will didn’t rest terribly well. He woke up several times crying and then eventually woke up in the morning much earlier than normal.

In the interest of keeping him on his routine, which I think is very helpful during times like that, we got up and headed off to school the next day. I briefed one of Will’s teachers on the issue as a heads up but also a way of explanation for why he might be more tired than normal that day.

When I went to pick him up later that afternoon, I asked his other teacher how he was. She said that yes he was a little tired. And she said he was talking about his grandmother but she was a little confused about the whole message. He told her that Meme came into his room early that morning and was biting his toes. She told him that it was ok because Meme had been sick and wasn’t herself. He apparently was quite upset about the whole toe biting incident. And his teacher was a bit puzzled.

That was until I clued her into the fact that Meme is not his grandmother but his imaginary friend. He calls my grandmother Nanny.

It was a light moment in the middle of a hard week as I imagined this poor young teacher trying to make sense of why a 92-year-old woman was biting a three-year-old’s toes. As our conversation went on, she said that Will had been talking about Meme quite a bit that week and every time, she had assumed it was his grandmother.

Boy, what a lot to digest, especially since Will usually talks about Meme going to Argentina where the old fire trucks are and to New York in his shiny red race car. Meme also sometimes visits his friend Who Who in California where they also ride on fire trucks and race cars.

I can only imagine the dinner conversations this preschool teacher had while she tried to figure out what was going on with Will’s wild 92 year old grandmother who was making weekly trips to South America and riding in a race car. Perhaps Nanny has something to look forward to at 93 now that she’s overcome pneumonia.

Hello to the Girl Next Door

Lara Bricker — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 14:30:39 -0500

Will has discovered the girl next door. She is 5. He is 3. I think we are in trouble.

This all came to be after my husband took Will for a walk a few weeks back. Will returned home to tell me that he went to Sydney’s house. He went on to tell me that she has a tree house and that they climbed up into the tree house, where there was a bed. They took their shoes off and went onto the bed.

“Mom, I want to go back to Sydney’s house and go in her bed again,” Will told me.

Maybe some day, I responded, not realizing that he took some day to mean every day, every minute, all the time.

Every day for the past week, he has quickly pointed out to me when we drive by the girl next door’s house. Within seconds he asks if he can go see her again, to go into the tree house, to go into her bed. Oh yes and to drive her kid-sized four wheeler, which they ride around the yard together.

Lest you think I am an over the top, overly protective mother here, I realize they are young. I realize this is completely innocent. I also realize that in about 10 years it may not be so innocent, and the tree house might not be so small. I also realize that this sounds very funny, which is why I am writing this down; so perhaps I can pull it out in 10 years to show Will and the girl next door.

I never had a boy next door. I grew up in Vermont where the closest neighbor was over a mile away. We had six kids in my elementary school class and only two of them were boys. The closest boy next door was about five miles down the street and so it wasn’t exactly probable that I was going to be hanging out in his tree house.

I remember once he biked to my house when we were in the fourth or fifth grade because a group of us were going to bike to school. That’s the benefit to being a child in Vermont; a group of kids could safely bike to and from school with no worries. Aside from the nasty dog we encountered half way there, there wasn’t much to trip us up on the ride.

Will has also discovered the joys of learning things from your friends that your parents might not be so happy about. In this case, he learned about McDonald’s Happy Meals. I learned this last week when I was down with the flu/cold/plague or whatever it was and lost my voice.

I had just picked up Will from school after lunch and was trying to put him down for his nap. He threw himself on the floor, kicking, screaming, spitting as he insisted that we had to leave right then and there to get a McDonald’s Happy Meal.

“My friend Drew told me about them, they are good, and they have ice cream,” he wailed. “I want a McDonald’s Happy Meal MOM.”

He also wanted a chocolate donut from Dunkin’ Donuts because “they are really good.”

I did what any mother with no voice in my situation would do. I sat there and watched him flail around on the floor for about 15 minutes. I remembered that awful line many parents use about if your friend jumps off the bridge, will you jump too? If your friend eats a Happy Meal, will you also? He finally stopped and looked at me long enough for me to whisper, “Do you ever see daddy act like this when he doesn’t get a McDonald’s Happy Meal? Do you want to be a man like daddy?”

He bit his lip, held back his tears and climbed into bed, apparently dissuaded from the Happy Meal for the time being. I’m a man, he announced. But a man who still has a thing for the girl next door, “When I wake up mom, can I go to Sydney’s house and go in her tree house?”

I am only hoping that Sydney isn’t a fan of Happy Meals.

And Then He Ate

Lara Bricker — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 14:34:56 -0500

Anyone else remember those small white lies your parents told you about food, like if you ate your carrots your eyes would see better?

So I swore I wouldn’t resort to any of these little exaggerations with Will. I know it’s another of those never say never with kids scenarios. But after now three years of trying to get the King of the Picky Eaters Society to eat something besides PB&J, grilled cheese or macaroni and cheese, I had to get a bit more creative.

It began with the introduction of soup in our regular Saturday family lunch. Will is obsessed with the book Chicken Soup with Rice and so I started off with chicken soup one Saturday. I began with the little mommy introduction to the lunch, “You want to be like that kid in the chicken soup book right Will? He really likes chicken soup. You can be like that too.”

He resisted at first. I tried again, even going so far as to sing the little chicken soup song that goes along with the book. He tried a small sip.

“I like it. I like chicken soup,” he responded, as if he was actually shocked that he liked the soup. He went on to sip his soup like it was his long lost favorite food.

At times like this, we mommies have to adopt the poker face tact. I continued eating my own soup as if nothing was out of the ordinary. Inside, of course, I was jumping up and down, as I realized it was score one for mommy over the picky eater.

The next week we moved onto tomato soup which in my small white lie plan was “spaghetti sauce soup” playing off of one of the only foods that Will eats consistently—pasta and sauce.

He again tried it and proclaimed, “I like spaghetti sauce soup.”

I put on the poker face again, not wanting to jinx my success.

On week three we added the move of dipping the grilled cheese sandwich into the “spaghetti soup” and again we had success.

I admit, I feel a little guilty about my slightly sneaky approach, but not that guilty. I think another part of his new willingness to try different foods comes from something they do in his school. Every child brings a piece of fruit with them which they put into a big bowl. They then share the fruit. So the fruit your child went to school with isn’t necessarily the fruit they will eat. I think seeing the other kids try different fruits has perhaps made Will more open to trying things.

Whatever the case, this week was the ultimate in our ongoing picky eater challenge. On Tuesday he actually ate chicken pot pie, though he did complain that the chicken wasn’t chicken nuggets like he was used to. The next night he ate shepherd’s pie and I confess I told a slightly larger white lie when I told him the mashed potatoes were bread. He’ll always eat bread no matter what but I’ve never ever been able to get him to take a bite of mashed potatoes. So what if he picked these up with his hands and proclaimed it was good bread, I wasn’t going to complain. We added another food to the repertoire. He also told me that the ground beef in the casserole was taco beef, but who was I to disagree, simply saying ‘Is that good taco beef Will.”

By Friday, I was starting to think we’d reached an eating milestone. Will actually ate pot roast, with gravy, and asked for seconds. He could hardly stuff the roast into his mouth fast enough, before telling me, “This is good Mom.”

What mom doesn’t like to hear that?

When (and how) Parents Get Their Grooves Back

Lara Bricker — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 11:48:55 -0500

I’ve noticed a trend among parents I know with young children lately—the phenomenon of the parent finding a little bit of pre-child person in themselves again. One dad I know has taken up running 5K races, another couple has both taken up running half-marathons. Ok, so that’s a wee bit overly ambitious for me, but then I wasn’t a runner before I had a child so it’s not likely I’m going to be a runner now. I returned to horseback riding this spring and for that one afternoon a week it’s like I’m my old self again. Before marriage, before child, before post child weight gain that while it went away left my body a completely different shape than it started. It’s nice to remember that the person you started out as is still in there for a few minutes.

Another friend of mine is reading the book The Girlfriends Guide to Getting Your Groove Back from that popular series which I have not read since I was pregnant. The advice she took from that book was to reconnect with your girlfriends who you haven’t seen in a while. Great advice, though putting it into practice was a lot harder than I imagined. It took me about four months to finally connect with this friend and it will likely be another few months before we do it again.

A friend of mine from college just had her first baby a few weeks back. I’ve been following her progress on facebook including the fact that she actually got outside for a walk, and then actually got outside without the baby alone for a bit when her husband was home. It makes me realize how far I’ve come and how long it really does take to get your groove back on so to say. I found myself thinking about the days I burst into tears for no apparent reason in the first weeks of motherhood, or the other days when I wore sweatpants all the time because none of my pre-baby clothes fit. Or the days when it seemed so exciting to just take a trip to the grocery store—alone.

When they say that having a child will change your entire life, they’re not kidding. It’s taken me three years to find a somewhat (knock on wood) manageable schedule of being mommy, being a writer, taking care of my grandmother, my horses and even my husband, who often ends up at the bottom of the list by default.

I am always envious of those parents who are able to get their groove back on so quickly, as if having a child was hardly anything to them, and they handle it without any problems. Okay, so in reality, they probably just hide it better than the rest of us. But then again, everyone’s situation is different, so everyone’s groove resurfaces at a different time.

For myself, I think the key to success has been taking one step at a time and realizing that it is going to take time to reach that really good, balanced place. It started with two short days of daycare during the week so that I could get my work done without a screaming child, moved to making a point of booking regular “dates” with my husband, and then moved to eating healthy meals on a consistent basis.

I started what I hope will become a Monday tradition this morning with a morning yoga class after I dropped Will at preschool. My hope is that it will put me in a good frame of mind to begin the week, being realistic about what I can accomplish, and in the process give me some killer abs and thighs. Because a six pack and toned thighs would really mean I’ve gotten my groove back.

Children's Rock Star Heads to Music Hall

Lara Bricker — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 11:09:08 -0400

Okay I admit before a few weeks ago I had never heard of Ralph’s World (www.ralphsworld.com), headed up by Ralph Covert, a long hair rock star with an electric guitar whose groupies are mostly between the ages of two and five.

I confess, since then, I have found myself singing along and rooting for Edward the Tap Dancing Elephant as he questions whether he’d made it to stardom.

“Look at the crowd, cheering and clapping. Do you believe, oh yeah, that Edward has made it. He’s living his dream and no one can stop him. Edward the Tap Dancing Elephant.”

Like Edward, Ralph certainly has made it. After a grassroots start, and a handful of children’s CD’s, he was signed by Disney. You can now catch him on the Disney Channel, in a music video on Youtube belting out the songs from his latest CD, The Rhyming Circus. This Sunday Oct. 25, you can see him live and in person at the Music Hall in Portsmouth.

Confession time again. There had been a few times I even forgot that I still had the latest Ralph’s World CD playing after I dropped off Will at school. Even worse, I found myself singing along to the CD when Will wasn’t in the car, especially to the Finger is the Singer song.

This is the genius of a certain group of children’s rock stars, they appeal not only to their pint sized groupies but also their very grown up parents. Ralph fits into this category. His songs have a familiar sound to them, and if I was better versed in popular music, I could probably name their original songs from which he occasionally borrows a tune. His sound is sometimes reminiscent of the Bare Naked Ladies, sometimes The Beatles (with the song “Abby’s Alphabet Soup”) and even I recognized the familiar sounds of Johnny Cash singing about the Folsom Prison Blues, which is Ralph’s World is The Folsom Daycare Blues.

“I hear the teacher coming, walking cross the room. I ain’t seen the sunshine, now it’s nearly noon. I’m suck in Folsom Daycare and time keeps dragging by I hear the teacher coming; I hang my head and cry.”

But it doesn’t matter what I think, the question is, what do the kids think of Ralph? Judging by Will’s reaction to the music, they love him. Will has become more than a bit obsessed with Ralph and insists that we listen to the CD every time we get in the car. The more amazing part is that somehow he seems to know the lyrics to all of the songs. He sings along with feeling from the backseat to the flagship song of the CD, “The Rhyming Circus” with catchy lyrics like “Bats in hats wearing suits and spats. And cats on mats what do you think of that. Fats the rat juggling some gnats. They’re all stars in the Rhyming Circus” along with the “Dogs in clogs riding Harley hogs.”

Perhaps the ability to attract not only children but adults to his music comes from Ralph’s background. Before creating Ralph’s World, he was part of the band The Bad Examples, a popular pop band around the club scene in the Great Lakes region. In addition to his rock background, Ralph has been a composer and educator. He has seven previous children’s CD’s before the latest Rhyming Circus repertoire.

Will has been through this children’s performer love affair before, with Mr. Steve, also on Disney Channel, and more locally Julie and Brownie, who sing about eating onions for lunch or their streamlined double decker bus. How long his love affair with Ralph will last remains to be seen, though he told me quite seriously the other day that he planned to get on stage with Ralph this weekend with, before telling me, “Mommy you have to stay in the back while I go up there.”

Oh the life of a rock star's mom. I wonder if this is how Ralph's mom feels.

It's Here: The Flu

Lara Bricker — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 09:49:17 -0400

I dropped Will off at school this morning for what will be his first day back after what I think was a cold, but who knows given the current germ climate around here. Everywhere I turn lately someone thinks they have the H1N1, their child has croup, their child might have H1N1 or they have the plain old flu.

Will still has a little runny nose, but he has been bouncing off the walls since Saturday and had no fever since Thursday. It’s Tuesday now so I think I’m safe. If not, I was about to lose it. I know there are other mothers out there in the same predicament—trying to work while staying home with the sick child. Many of us have to work and just because we’re home with said sick child doesn’t mean we can totally stop working. And so we do what I call the piecemeal working thing. Get the sick child set up with juice, Tylenol, a blanket and Sesame Street, and we then try to squeeze in a few minutes of work. In the process of course you become completely stressed out, run down and potentially sick yourself. It’s a vicious cycle.

I know some parents who are going into their second week of having to stay home with their sick child or children. It’s tough but I guess we’re all going to go through it at some point. We can all commiserate together about how we made it through the time with a sick child, how far behind we got at work, and how we now have managed to come down with whatever the child had to start with.

I haven’t really been too fired up about the big H1N1 outbreak. I mean it’s the flu people and a less severe flu than the real, old-fashioned flu we’ve all had at some point. But still, I had been planning to get Will vaccinated last week when his doctor ran a flu clinic. Of course that didn’t work out given the fact that Will was sick at the time. So I suppose we’ll try to get the vaccine this week, if it’s still in stock.

What has been worrying me a little about the H1N1 is how quickly it seems to be spreading around our area. I’ve heard of several local elementary schools where students have been diagnosed with this strain. And I’ve heard of some local parents who have been diagnosed as well.

I guess the only think I can do at this point is try to finish up my work ahead of time. If I end up home sick with the pig flu, there will likely be no piecemeal working arrangement. Perhaps it’s time for a little more OJ, of self imposed solitude until it passes through our area.

How do other working moms make it through when you are home with sick children? Do you put off work for a few days? Try to squeeze work in while home? Trade off staying home with your spouse so you don’t get too far behind at work?

Candy for Costumes

Lara Bricker — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 20:29:03 -0400

Candy for Costumes.

That’s what Activities Director Debby Eastman is calling the costume collection extravaganza planned for Oceanside Center nursing home on Lafayette Road in Hampton on Sunday Oct. 18.

Eastman, who has worked with the elderly in nursing homes for 30 years, said Oceanside residents will collect used Halloween costumes for the Seacoast Family Food Pantry in Portsmo uth.

“I am really excited about this and so are the residents of our home,” said Eastman. The residents will be on hand to collect the costumes, she said.

“We are hoping that the children will come with their parents to drop off their costumes,’ said Eastman. “Nursing home residents seldom get to see children, and they just love it when they visit. On top of that, they miss seeing children trick-or-treating so this should be great.”

Eastman said she hopes this early trick-or-treat event will be a great experience for everyone.

“We hope to get a lot of costumes for the (Portsmouth) Seacoast Family Food Pantry,’ she said. “It can be expensive to buy Halloween costumes, and we hope this will give a hand to parents who are financially challenged.”

The Candy for Costumes collection will take place from noon to 2 p.m. Parents are encouraged to bring their children. Nursing home residents will be on hand in the lobby to collect the costumes and give the kids a treat.

“I believe the Seacoast community is so generous and I am trusting this is going to be a great day,” said Eastman.

Oceanside Center, Skilled Nursing and Rehab, which is managed by Genesis, is the former Haven Health Center on Tuck Road.

For more information, call Eastman at 926-4551 Ext. 4314.

Healthy Eating for Everyone in the Family

Lara Bricker — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 15:30:26 -0400

Lately when I see people I haven’t seen in a while, they seem to think I’ve lost weight. Now, I really haven’t lost that much weight, maybe five to eight pounds, but I always give the same answer to these people: “I’ve been eating more fruits and vegetables, go figure.”

Sounds simple, almost too simple, but it’s true.

So why is this even a big deal for me? Well, with a child and attempts to teach your child healthy eating habits, you tend to look at your own eating habits. Mine were, well, not so hot. For a good portion of the past year I sustained myself on a diet of coffee, bread, cheese, meat and wine. Sounds great doesn’t it. No vegetables, no fruit, nothing healthy.

Then I took an honest look back at what I ate when I was a child—prepackaged frozen foods made up a good portion of my diet. My mother was a single mother who didn’t really have time, or inclination, to cook and thus we ate a lot of cheap, frozen dinners. Oh, the frozen lasagna, frozen pizza or my personal favorite the chicken croquettes with the little side pack of gravy. Tasted good at the time, but these set me up for a life of unhealthy eating habits. Whenever I felt stressed or anxious, I found myself turning to these comfort foods of my childhood. It really made me realize that what you feed your child when they are young does stick with them for life, I was a classic example of this.

Ironically, we have always fed Will healthier food than we fed ourselves—he was getting low fat yogurt for snacks and organic low sugar graham crackers. While my husband and I were chowing down on nacho chips and carbs.

This spring two things happened to me during my work that helped change my eating habits. First, I did a story on a local dietician who was encouraging people to make one simple change in their diet-eat more fruits and vegetables. If you make sure half of your place is fruits and vegetables, you will not only be healthier but also ward off potential health problems. Then secondly, I did a story on a fruit and vegetable delivery service that was starting on the Seacoast. Both of these stories came together in my carb and caffeine laden mind to form an idea for change. If I bought the fruits and vegetables from the delivery service, I would feel obligated to eat them as I’d already paid for them. Secondly, with the addition of more fruits and vegetables in our refrigerator, I would plan our meals around the vegetables, then add the meats.

It’s amazing what a little fruit and vegetable in your diet can do. Again, go figure. Every week, our tote of vegetables and fruits arrive and I sit down to plan our menu for the week. It helps I guess that I like to cook when I do this. I take an ingredient and punch it into the search engine on Cooking Light or Food TV’s web site and find a recipe that looks good. This is especially helpful with foods that I haven’t really ever prepared, such as kale. I found a wonderful and easy recipe for kale with lemon juice, butter, balsamic vinegar and raisins. It was so tasty that I actually found myself eating more vegetables with dinner than meat. And my thighs were seeing the results.

This has translated into better eating for Will as well. He (I am sitting down for this one) actually ate broccoli last week. Okay, okay, I told him that if he ate the broccoli he would be so strong that he could lift up an entire house. A wee white lie, but it worked. Will’s new school has also helped with healthy eating. They have this wonderful little thing they do with the kids to encourage healthy fruits and vegetables. Every child brings a piece of fruit every day, which is put on a tray and then they all share all of the fruit. This is great because not only is Will excited to bring his fruit to share, but he’s trying new kinds of fruits.

I won’t lie, I have had a few chicken croquette like regressions since starting this new healthy eating regime. But for the most part they have been short lived and I’ve been back on the vegetable train in no time.

I even tried chard—go figure. Now we wait to see if Will will try it too.

A Visit from Mrs. Labonbon

Lara Bricker — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 11:36:41 -0400

I love my son dearly. But lately, he’s driving me crazy.

Will has always been a fairly well-behaved little boy, not overly loud, obnoxious or bratty. That was until about a week and a half ago. All of a sudden, the little sweet boy we knew turned into a monster.

I was beside myself. We have always been consistent with Will about what is and is not considered acceptable behavior. He may resist from time to time, but for the most part after a little bit of tears, he’s fine; which is what made this new stage even more unsettling.

He was talking in a bratty voice, almost baby talk at times, and throwing things, talking over people, throwing himself on the floor and having temper tantrums. It was awful.

When I put out the word to my mother friends on Facebook, everyone said, “Oh that’s the phase, that’s part of the next phase.” But I couldn’t believe it. I really thought that something must have changed his behavior. The only new variable was that he was in school now with more kids. I wondered if perhaps he was seeing bad behavior by some of the other children and copying that.

All I know is that the issue reached a peak on a rainy day two weekends ago when Will ran down the stairs, opened the door, ran outside and came about two inches from falling over a six foot or so stone wall/drop onto our neighbor’s property. I admit, I yelled at him, partly because he was laughing at me when I tried to discipline him, like this was a fun new game.

I was beside myself.

I talked with his teacher the next day at school. She too had noticed that he was not listening very well or settling down to do work at school. She agreed to keep and eye on things from her end and I would try to really reinforce things on my end.

And then word of a woman named Mrs. Labonbon arrived in our house.

Will’s godmother, who is a very creative woman, came over for dinner after hearing about his recent behavior. Over dinner, she told Will about this “horrible” and “rude” she knew called Mrs. Labonbon. Mrs. Labonbon was loud, chewed with her mouth open and never said please or thank you. She was so horrible, in fact, that even the ants ran outside and into their ant hole to get away from her loud voice.

Will listened as intently as I had ever seen.

He then told me that he did not want Mrs. Labonbon to come to his house. Oh, she won’t, I told him, as long as you are a polite and nice boy who listens to directions and behaves. Mrs. Labonbon only goes where children and adults are naughty because she looks for people like herself.

He took it all in.

The next day, I dropped him off at school, and told him I hoped he had a good day and listened to his teacher.

He did. His teacher said it was his best day of the year so far. Each day of the week after that only got better. Whenever we had a moment at home where he started to regress to the bratty behavior, I mentioned that I hoped Mrs. Labonbon didn’t come over. It worked like a charm. Now I don’t want to scare him into behaving and am realizing I might need to take it easy with the Labonbon talk. But it does seem to be working so far and, well, sometimes you have to go with what works.

Potty Training Chronicles

Lara Bricker — Sun, 27 Sep 2009 10:19:54 -0400

Welcome to the Chronicles of Potty Training. I you’ve all been there, or if not, are anticipating the day when diapers are no more. Think of all the money you’ll save. Oh how nice it will be to finally say goodbye to diapers. (Of course it has since been pointed out to me that other expenses will simply take the place of diapers.)

I’ve always followed the philosophy of trying not to put too much pressure on Will about the potty training thing, fearing that it might backfire on me. We didn’t make a big deal of potty training, pointing out the training potty to Will on a regular basis, but not really pushing him. We assumed that when it was time, we would know and it would all happen as intended.

Then a few months ago, Will just decided to start using his little toilet. Within about a week he was using it all the time. He proclaimed that he was not going to use diapers anymore. He was a big boy. He threw an out and out fit when I ran out of pull ups training pants and had to use a left over diaper on him one day. This was great.

Sure, I figured it would be a while before he could sleep at night without a pull up, but hey, that was only natural.

I was actually feeling pretty pleased with myself about our whole laid back potty training approach. Will essentially potty trained himself and we didn’t have to expend all that effort that our friends had. It’s all about when the child is ready, I told myself, and he was ready.

And then, somehow, he regressed.

We went from him using the toilet 80 to 85 percent of the time, to 50 percent of the time.

So what happened?

Did we need to put more pressure on him? Take a tougher stance from the potty police? I don’t really know. All I know is that we now seem to be at the stage of potty training limbo. We’re not really making any progress with the potty. Sometimes he uses it, sometimes he doesn’t. Sometimes he wants to sit on the potty for what seems like forever, telling me “No, no wait, I’m almost done.” Almost done seems to mean anywhere from 10 minutes to 30 minutes depending on the day. Yesterday, he peacefully sat on the pot while I put away all of the backed up clean laundry from the past week.

At school, when he sees the other kids using the toilet, he often goes along with them. But then there are other days that he doesn’t seem to use the potty at all.

I’m telling myself we just need some potty patience here. After all, eventually he will put the whole concept together, not 50 percent of the time, but maybe 90 percent of the time. And I can dream of the day of saving money on diapers—a really nice concept after realizing that the fancy pull ups training pants are about twice as expensive as diapers.

Until then, we wait. And make sure that Will has a good supply of reading material.